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I
am not sure what I am doing the 4th of July. I may see
some fireworks and eat some food cooked over the grill. Even though
it is coming right up I am not sure what is happening. My son and
family maybe moving on that day. It is all up in the air. I guess
that is life. We are never sure of anything. I know I make plenty
of plans. I have my life all mapped out and then sometimes comes
along and upsets all my planning. I sometimes wonder how much of
life is really under my control. So much of it is beyond my grasp.
What
is really surprising is that I know life is bigger than my small
world but I still work hard on trying to control life. July 4th
is about freedom. Perhaps this holiday I need to relax and be more
free in life. I do not need to control as much of life as I try to
do. My plans are not finalized yet but as I think about the day, I
think I will take time to thank God for the freedom He gives me to
relax and let Him run the world.
Today
is a rough day for me. It is not that anything has happened or will
be happening to me that is causing this to be a tough time. It is
all in my head. During my morning walk I started to think about all
the things that are piling up on me and all the things that I don’t
like about where I am at in life. Before long I was throwing a ‘pity
party’ for myself. As I sit here writing these words I know I am on
the wrong path and yet this is one of those times that it is
difficult for me to get out of this place.
However,
I do know that this feeling will soon pass and it is just a feeling
not reality. The reality of my life is that there is so much to be
thankful for and so much to rejoice in. I think I will start to
count my blessings because I know that when I do such a thing my
whole attitude begins to change. It is amazing what the mind can do
or should I say what God can do with a mind that looks at His
goodness.
This past weekend had some moments where working with people was a challenge. One person wants some changes at the church. Their point is well taken and probably a bit selfish but still worth considering. However this person does not seem to realize that I have to work through the structure. I cannot just wave my magic wand and find solutions. In this case a committee is working on trying to find a great solution for the entire church not just one individual. But the individual seems to be getting more worked up each day about the issue. At least from my viewpoint they are on a mission and will not stop until someone meets their ‘demands.’
I realize the this person is having some trying times. Life is not easy for them and I am sure this makes their concern all the more important to them. I realized again this past weekend that people are people. But more than that I saw again that each person is God’s son or daughter. I hope I can stay focused on loving all and not get caught up in the issues that all too easily divide. So, pray for me this week there is no way I can avoid others and really no way I want to avoid them either.
I
have been spending some night alone. My spouse is in Chicago with my
older son and his family. They flew in from Belgium and are going to
relocate in the Chicago area. He is going to be teaching at a
University in the city and is looking for a place to live. Phyllis
(my spouse) is driving them around as they are looking not only for
housing but a good school for our grandson. We (both my spouse and
I) are glad to be of help. We both feel that family is a very
important mission field. If we, as parents, do not show God’s love
to those close to us we have failed greatly.
So,
when Phyllis left for Chicago I jokingly said she is going on a
mission trip. It really is not joke. She is on a mission and it is
every bit as important as any other mission trip. So, I write these
words just a reminder to myself and others that sometimes a follower
of Jesus can forget an important mission field very close to home.